I owe you an apology


One beautiful lesson in my color magic challenge is the art of forgiveness. Looking at yourself in the mirror and honestly falling unconditionally in love with you as a being.

the hair

the lips

the eyes


your chest

your hips

your toes

I mentioned Ho’ponopono to you before and started my grayish morning listening to its serenity fully and completely. Letting go and allowing the words to wash over me cascades a sheet of peace all around me. I feel fluttery just writing to you as the music plays in the background. Yes! I am totally urging you to just bask in these words for a moment: I am sorryPlease forgive meThank you.

Being exactly where I am today was not expected. Who knew I would be mending my paternal relationship, healing a dramatic inner child and wooing the world with a fabulous display of color worth flaunting. I do honor my lessons and am so grateful to all those that reached out to me in my time of need.

Outcrying a self-limiting defeat led to so many people taking the time to connect with me because they honestly care. So I am apologizing to those that genuinely care for me because of my actions. I suffer by comparing my own beauty. Working with peacock energy and colors have re-centered my focus toward compassion and I intend to forgive myself.

It’s wonderful to see the beauty in others. But it can be equally addicting and harmful. What if the beautiful peacock plucked all his feathers out because he wanted to be a chicken? That’s how I felt- angry and on a warpath because I refused to settle for a wimpy act of mercy.

Deciding to do away with the one relationship that kept all of my attention last year kept me in an expectation hangover. It did not go the exact way I saw it play out inside my head. FUCK! So now, I am figuring out what the experience means to me. How can I value the moment for all that it is worth?

The beauty in being human is that we are an active participant living and learning in whatever capacity that may be. Choosing to do nothing is still a choice. Choosing to be silent and observe is a choice. Choosing to skydive with your partner as the sun sets is a choice. What are you choosing to do with your life right now?

Right now, I am choosing to forgive.

I am still in this expectation hangover and I will recover as needed. But in the meantime please forgive me as I do the best that I can. I love to succeed cause this warrior isn’t going to give up the fight just yet. It’s a beautiful new year and there is so much for the taking that I can’t help but wonder if this is the year where I will be taking my most precious gift of all and giving it back to the one person that truly deserves it – me.

Lets continue to build our spirit together in perfect love and perfect trust. Oh and some color! I have two power colors right now for myself and they are Heliotrope and Amethyst, how about you?

Until next time <3 :star: and :mrgreen:

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