The Virgo new moon is coming and I’m tired of reading the same stuff about starting new things, redecorate or organize things. Can I be honest, Bernard? I want a man in my life. Is it okay to mention astrology in my dating profile?

– A/S/L

Dear A/S/L,

Happy Virgo New Moon to you! I love astrology and follow it casually. But I do know that the majority of people talk about the zodiac in shallow conversations. Hardly pointing out that there are more layers to your astrological birth certificate than a greasy truck stop souvenir. Talking about astrology to someone who’s also interested in decoding the cosmos is fun. Talking about astrology with someone who’s compulsively religious to science and condescendingly talks down to you about pseudosciences and philosophies is some major dry ass pussy right there. It’s dry because they are actively erasing feelings, experiential patterns, and the interwoven fabric of our universe. I swipe left on people who don’t process their emotional selves or have zero interest in the spirituality of human beings. Next.

Your online dating profile is a platform to show others who you are, why you’re here, and what you’re looking to get out of this experience. The issue I have with dating apps is simple – it’s too ego-centric. The whole idea of a relationship is to commit to people as well as bringing whatever you have and who you are to the table unapologetically (this is committing to yourself). Online dating isn’t how it used to be 10 years ago. Now it’s simply a swipe and your cupid buzz wears off. It feels like we overthink what to put inside our profiles, how to pick photos, and why we push ourselves into relationships before we’re ready.

Astrology is interesting and like color I see the stars as an indicator of our moods. Collectively and individually. I don’t believe things happen exactly on astrological dates, just because it’s a new moon, doesn’t mean you’ll start something new, come into a new relationship, or find a fat check in your bank account. Things take time. Dating isn’t instant. And chemistry requires you to put your isolation to the side, and see yourself more independently from older versions of yourself. So I ask you, what do you want astrology to say about you?

Much of the characteristic information on astrology similar to color meanings are shallow sound bites that don’t communicate the larger conversation. If you both mention the same underground astrologer on Instagram, that’s a great convo starter! Beyond your zodiac sign, what is it you’d like someone else to know about you, your life, or your contribution? Remember they’re reading this from their own vantage point so you’ll want to step outside of what you get from dating, and think about what is it that you’re bringing to the other person. We all bring experiences, histories, ideas, and our own unique chemistry ingredient.

Astrology isn’t evil. Listen to this podcast and you’ll see what I mean.

Bottomline. When it comes to putting astrology samplers inside your profile it comes down to you being okay with the notion that someone might swipe left on you because of their own judgments. Zeal for the zodiac is like porn, some love it, some don’t. And that’s ok. Because again, you are not here to please everyone and nor should you because a real relationship is about sharing where you’re at now, who you are today, and what you want to build together.

Your dating profile is a constellation and you don’t have control over what others see from the outline, so be intentional about the points you share and know why you’re sharing them.

HelloRainbow is an advice column about color, spirituality, magic, and how to be a compassionate intuitive in a non-believing world. Got a question for us fill out the form

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